People can be pushy, especially when they are under the influence of alcohol. They lose their sense of boundaries and appropriateness- even if you’ve told them you recently went to treatment for alcoholism. Here are some other pointers for what to say when someone won’t let up in trying to get you to drink.
No is a two letter sentence
“No” is the shortest sentence there is. Two letters. One word. One powerful statement. All you have to say when somebody offers you a drink is “No”. If you want to be extra polite and courteous you can add on a “No, thank you.” You might not be thankful that someone offered you a drink, but you can be thankful that you’re sober and have learned to gracefully decline an invitation to relapse. Sometimes, “no” doesn’t always work.
When No doesn’t work, try telling a truthful lie
You wouldn’t be lying if you told them you were the designated driver. Though there are drinking standards which would make it “safer” to drive after consuming alcohol, any good designated driver knows that they shouldn’t have any alcohol if they are going to be responsible for other people. By being sober, you are designated driver forever, as long as you are sober. If you aren’t actually driving other people, you’re designated sober for yourself. Other truthful lies can include statements like, “I’m not drinking tonight” or “I’ve stopped drinking for now”. Since alcohol impairs judgment and rationalization your healthy logic might make too much sense for someone who is drunk.
When truthful lies don’t work, repeat No, with some boundaries
Say “No” as many times as you need to and then add in some boundaries. Boundaries are the way you start creating a line which designates what you are and are not willing to tolerate. For example, saying, “No, please do not ask me again” is setting a boundary. When someone inevitably asks you again, you follow up with a more strict boundary like, “I said No and asked you not to ask me again. If you ask me again, I’m going to (insert your consequence here)”. You decide what the consequence should be.
If all else fails, break down your alcoholic truth
The truth is, no matter their urging, people really don’t want you to drink, they just don’t know it yet. Your friends may only remember your fun partying without knowing the depths of loneliness and despair you reached in your drinking. If they just won’t give up, hit them with the truth. You have nothing to be ashamed of about having alcoholism and working a strong program of recovery. Let them know exactly what’s likely to happen if you say yes and take that drink. “Play the tape”, as you often hear in recovery, all the way through for them. There’s a good chance they’ll ask you again anyway, but a better chance that they won’t.
Change follows action. Seeking treatment for alcoholism makes you a winner, not a failure. You’re taking action in your life which is going to create lifelong change. There is hope in recovery. Call Design For Change today to discuss your options for treatment and recovery in our inspirational programs. Call (877) 267-3646 today.